Chaos is the future, and beyond it is freedom. - Sonic Youth, Confusion Is Next

So close to being home. Can't tell anyone details about my trip, but it's soon. ha.

Before I get there, I have to turn in gear here, have post deployment classes and start setting everything back up for my arrival home.

Did the change of address thing, set up my utilities for the apartment, reserved the uhaul and freight elevator for moving in, reserved the motel room for my parents and I that first night, scheduled a time for the cable company to come and hook me up, working on scheduling an appointment to see the ortho docs when I return.

Pfew. I'm tired. I hope I don't miss something. I'm excited to get home, but the first few days are going to be crazy. After I'm moved in and checked in at work, things will calm down.

I can't believe it's so close. I can't believe I may never see some of these people again. I hope I see some of them again.

How I did on my goals:
1. Grow as a nurse. Done this already. The hospital isn't always fast paced, but I'm seeing so many new things.
At times. I saw a lot of things I hadn't seen before, but then there were times I just felt like I was losing brain cells.
2. Study my GRE. Hm. Not doing so hot on this goal. I've made it to page 2 in my study guide.
Never really got into this. Since I'm going to Jax in October and I'll be there 3 years before applying to grad school, I'm not too worried. I hope to take a GRE class at some point back home.
3. Get financially stable. Doing pretty good on this. I've paid off my credit card and next month will have my car paid off.
Excellent on this goal. Car and credit card paid off. Saved up a decent amount; however, I just hope I don't spend it all in the first month home. I have so many deposits and payments to make to set everything back up. I'm not looking forward to paying rent again, or buying food....or even water. bah.
4. Grow spiritually. I'm doing okay on this, but I want to be a lot closer to God. I need to spend more quiet time with Him.
I probably should have grown a lot closer and spent more time.
5. Physically. I'm working out a ton more and trying to get more toned. It's working for the most part. Could be eating better though......I'll do good and then splurge.
Did pretty decent on this one. I'm more toned, but because of all the spin class and ellipticals, my muscles in my legs and butt have grown and I can hardly fit in my jeans! It's not more fat though. I just don't get it. I still eat way more here than I do at home.
6. Let go of some emotional baggage I've been carrying around. Time to move on.
I def think I made improvements on this one. But, in a way, I just replaced one thought with another. Oh well. I feel much more healthy about the past. I can't lie and say that my heart doesn't break when I think about it, but I don't linger on it. I have better things to do than think about things that I don't control.

(On a side note....I did come close to beating Joe in NCAA football on xbox last night. That's a VAST improvement from the beginning of the deployment when I couldn't score at all!)

So, overall I made some improvements. I actually think I'll get more done once I'm settled in back home. I buy healthy food. I have my gym all to myself downstairs and no beefy guys to intimidate me. I'll get back to focusing on work. Maybe even build in a little social life for me back home. I'll have to relearn how to do that after being here. All my friends and I are just naturally around each other and do everything together. No outside distractions. I'll have to get used to that.

In a way, I feel like this time is going to be kept in a little box set aside. I'll think of it like it really happened, but it's almost like a separate time that fits into my life. It seems like it went fast, but at times slow.

I keep thinking of how to say goodbye to some of the people here and I just can't picture it. At least most of us can stay in touch through facebook and things like that.

Hm. Well, guess I'd better get my butt up and to the gym.