Do your best, do everything you can, and don't you worry what their bitter hearts are going to say. - Jimmy Eat World, The Middle

the front of the hospital
From inside the hospital
Our helo pad at sunset
Corspman up!
Go coast guard!

How do I put into words what I have experienced in the last week? I'll start in bullets by what I have learned:

1. Always have a seabag packed and your legs shaved!
I went to work Wednesday morning for our early staff meeting and new collateral meeting. I went home and caught up on what had happened in Haiti. I thought about the fact that I might need to pack in case they sent me somewhere, but I didn't hear anything about it that morning at work, so I figured they would be sending some people from the larger hospitals, etc. So, I took a nap. I was just falling asleep when I got a call from my department head.

D.H. "Now, this is no joke...but can you be packed and at the hospital in an hour to fly to Haiti?"
Me "Uh....yes!"
D.H. "Okay, pack some toiletries and a few articles of clothing and get up here!"
Me "Okay"

I got off the phone and threw a few curse words out there and started tearing apart my apartment. Be at the hospital in an hour?? That means leave in 3o-45 minutes! Oh, crap! Okay, grab the seabag....toiletries...check....which uniform am i going to need? Green camis? Desert camis? pack white undershirts and brown undershirts just in case....gotta call Tanya to watch Patton. Thank goodness she still has my extra key! Call mom! Pack a towel. Get Patton's carrier out in case Tanya needs to pick him up. Are his food and water bowls filled? Yes...okay.. Now, black boots and brown boots just in case. Cover? Check. Deodorant. A must. LUNA BARS! I'll need a snack on the plane. Tennis shoes. Sunglasses. IPOD! CAMERA! Change. Throw my hair up in a bun. Grab the seabag.......why didn't I shave my legs when I had the chance?? Now, I'll be in Haiti with hair as long as bigfoot.

I was just running out the door when I got a call that the plane had already left and that I had a few hours, but to still get ready and get up to the base.

2. I guess nurses can get called in a few hours notice and leave the country that day and never even know it was coming.
I just never really thought we were the ones that would be deployed on a moment's notice. Even the Comfort got 48 hrs. It hit me Wednesday night when our group of 7 were being jetted across the bay in Cuba on a fast boat and I was looking up at the stars all over the sky and realizing that that morning when I woke up I had NO idea I'd be in Cuba that night.....

3. Cuba is beautiful! This is a paradise! Warm, palm trees. Blue water!

4. You don't need to be oriented to a unit in order to take care of patients.
We were checking in on the quarterdeck Thursday morning and we started hearing everyone yelling "get to the ER! We have a helo coming in with 5 patients!" So, I dropped my bag and ran. Quick intro to all the doctors and nurses. We teamed up with some corpsmen and doctors to see who was going to work with what ER bed and quickly filled my pockets with flushes, IV supplies, alcohol swabs, etc. Figured out how to work their monitors and tried to calm my heart down. It was beating out of my chest. We all got our gowns and gloves on....and then found out.....they were just pilots hitching a ride......no patients. WHAT? Well, then we got a real orientation to the hospital.

5. Some times you have to let go and let God do His thing.
The first couple days were great. Scary, but great. We were bringing patients in that still were covered in rubble and rocks and giving them comfort and taking care of them. I have only been in the ICU for about 2 months and really haven't had to deal with trauma patients, so I will tell you I was scared out of my mind, but I knew that if something came my way, I'd be able to handle it somehow.
Well, we would watch CNN and go nuts that we weren't there! We wanted to be doing more! We were told we were going to Haiti, but we stopped in Cuba to support the hospital here. We thought about all the things we could be doing there if we were just there! Sometimes, you just can only do what you can do. Everyone is put in a place for a reason.
It grew even more frustrating when I saw all the nurses leaving on the Comfort and going to the amphib, Bataan and to EMF's either here or in Haiti.

6. Everyone is allowed a few days of emotional roller coasters
Our group thought we were going to be among the first health care providers to Haiti and we were so proud to leave everything and do that.....and then after a few days in Cuba and things calmed down and went back to the norm....we were a little annoyed. I had a few days there where I would wake up positive, see CNN and friend's facebook status of what they were doing on the comfort and I'd get mad I wasn't there....then get sad because of the things I left at home....and then mad because some of us were having to work in our group while others got to enjoy the island....and then frustrated at how slow the hospital is on a normal basis....and then tell myself that I'm in the navy and I just need to stop being a puss and get over it. So, then I'd be positive and the cycle would continue. I had a few days of that and I've come to terms with the situation. I do believe our group did something great by just saying "YES, I will go! Right now" and want to go and do good. If those first few days were the only action we are going to see, then it's been worth it. To give comfort to the small hospital here that there are other nurses, doctors and corpsmen that are coming to help, then it's been worth it. To learn about Cuba and another part of the world's history, then it's been worth it. To just experience this and learn from it, it's been worth it.

7. Always meet your neighbors
We're in townhomes right near the hospital and one night our CRNA and the other nurse and I were on the patio having a beer and cigars and we met our neighbor. He is from Afghanistan and moved to Nebraska in 1983. He has been here in Cuba for 6 years working as a translator for the prison on the other side of the base. It was so interesting to pick his mind and see what he thinks about all of this. Surprisingly, he is adamant about them all being there for a reason. He says they don't get there on accident and they are all criminals. it was just interesting to talk about our cultures, his move to the US, his religious beliefs, etc. He's having a get together tomorrow and is going to cook us some Afghan food! We're excited!

8. The military is the most open minded group of people I've met
I've seen this before, but it really hit me the other day when our neighbor, our CRNA, the other nurse and I were outside with our beers and cigars and discussing a religion. In that small group you had a Catholic, a protestant, a Muslim and a deist. We all believe in God. Maybe He has a different name. But, we believe He saves us. We see Him in everything around us. We believe in love and loving others. Maybe there are little details that separate us, but we are all the same in one form or fashion. We were able to talk about our faith and accept each other and discuss our differences. Maybe it has just opened up an area where we can discuss this more, but it just warmed my heart to be able to at least enjoy each others differences. I see this a LOT in the military. People from all areas of the world and different walks of life coming together under strange and difficult circumstances and growing together.

9. I gotta get out and enjoy this island.
I could stay home and fester like I have for the past few days, but there is no point. I'm here for now. Who knows what will come our way and when I'm not working I'm going to enjoy it here.

10. I have the best friends and family a girl could ask for!
I left voicemails for Tanya and Phil asking if they could please check on Patton while I'm gone and they even picked him up and moved his litter box, food and water bowls, bed, and stuffed animal all over to their new home. She even had to give Patton a bath after he got sick in the short car ride. I feel awful that she's having to do that, but I'm so thankful she's been there to help me. I don't know what I would have done without them! Jessica even ran all over Jacksonville the day I left to run my laptop up to me at the air terminal! Just in time for me to leave. I didn't think to bring it because I thought we'd be in Haiti, but then was told to bring it for when I was in Cuba. I'm so glad I did and even more thankful that Jess went to get it for me! They've put things together to send to me here, like my camera cables and a sweatshirt or two. My mom had called Tanya to bring the sweatshirts because i was so cold on the plane ride down. The military family is the strongest family you will ever have.

God bless and goooooo Navy!